"I Guess It was fine": Young Woman Recounts Spiritual Experiences after Week in Woods

Ogden, UT — In a stunning display of introspection and mild enthusiasm, local young woman Emily Johnson, 24, has emerged from a week-long Girls’ Camp in the Wasatch Mountains with a series of spiritual experiences that she described as “okay”.

Johnson, who embarked on the trip as part of a church-sponsored retreat aimed at fostering spiritual growth and connection with nature, recounted her journey with a mix of nonchalance and vague enlightenment. “I mean, it was fine,” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “I saw some trees, did a little hiking, and there was this one moment when I thought I heard a whisper in the wind. But, like, I guess it was just the breeze.”

During her time in the woods, Johnson participated in various activities designed to promote reflection and connection with the divine. These included meditation sessions by the campfire, group discussions about faith, and a particularly memorable moment when she attempted to commune with nature by hugging a tree. “I thought it would be more profound,” she admitted. “But it just felt like hugging a really big stick.”

Despite her lukewarm enthusiasm, Johnson did manage to find some moments of clarity. “There was this one sunrise that was kind of pretty,” she recalled. “I took a picture for Instagram, and I think I captioned it something like ‘Nature is cool’ or whatever. So, that was nice.”

Her fellow campers, however, had a different take on the experience. “Emily was definitely in her own world,” said Sarah Thompson, a close friend who joined the retreat. “While the rest of us were having these deep, spiritual moments, she was mostly just trying to figure out how to make s’mores without burning the marshmallows.”

When asked about the impact of the Girls’ Camp on her spiritual life, Johnson responded with a thoughtful pause. “I guess I learned that nature is, like, a thing,” she said. “And maybe I should spend more time outside? But also, I really missed my phone. I mean, how am I supposed to keep up with TikTok trends without Wi-Fi?”

As the group returned to civilization, Johnson’s reflections continued to be marked by a sense of ambivalence. “I think I’ll probably go camping again,” she mused. “But next time, I’ll bring a portable charger and maybe some better snacks. I mean, granola bars are fine, but they don’t really hit the spot like a good pizza.”

In the end, Johnson’s week in the woods may not have transformed her into a spiritual guru, but it did provide her with a few moments of mild appreciation for the great outdoors. “So, yeah, I guess it was fine,” she concluded with a smile. “And who knows? Maybe next time I’ll actually feel something.”

As she returned to her daily routine, Johnson remains optimistic about her future camping endeavors, hoping that with a little more preparation—and perhaps a few more Instagram likes—she might just find the spiritual awakening she’s been searching for.