Members Asked to Pay Extra 1% for Church Cleaning Blessings

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has announced that members will now be asked to pay an additional 1% of their income for the privilege of cleaning their local meetinghouses. This new initiative, dubbed “Cleaning Blessings,” is said to provide spiritual benefits that are “beyond measure.”

Brother John DoGooder, a spokesperson for the church, explained, “We have always believed in the importance of service, and what better way to serve than by scrubbing toilets and vacuuming floors? The extra 1% will ensure that members can fully participate in this sacred duty.”

Sister Janeston, a long-time member, expressed her excitement about the new program. “I can’t wait to see the blessings pour in! I’ve always felt that cleaning the church was a bit of a chore, but now that I know it’s a paid privilege, it feels so much more meaningful.”

However, not everyone is thrilled with the announcement. Some members have taken to social media to voice their concerns. “Isn’t tithing enough?” one member tweeted. “Now we have to pay extra to clean? What’s next, a fee for attending sacrament meeting?”

Despite the mixed reactions, the church remains optimistic. “We believe this will bring our community closer together,” Brother Storks said. “And who knows, maybe we’ll even see a rise in the quality of cleaning. After all, nothing motivates like a little extra cash.”

As the program rolls out, members are encouraged to embrace the opportunity and remember that cleanliness is next to godliness. And for those who might be struggling with the additional financial burden, the church has kindly reminded them that “the blessings will be worth it.”

So grab your mops and brooms, and get ready to clean your way to heaven!