Missionaries to Proselyte in Virtual Reality, Church Cites Safety Concerns

In a groundbreaking move to ensure the safety of its missionaries, the LDS Church has announced that all proselyting efforts will now take place in virtual reality. This decision comes after numerous concerns about the physical and emotional well-being of missionaries in the field.

“We believe this is the future of missionary work,” said Elder Tech Savvy, head of the church’s new Virtual Missionary Department. “With VR, we can reach people in the comfort of their own homes without the risks associated with traditional door-to-door proselyting.”

The new initiative, dubbed “Missionary 2.0,” will equip each missionary with a state-of-the-art VR headset and a custom-built virtual world where they can interact with potential converts. The virtual environment will include digital replicas of iconic locations such as the Sacred Grove, the Salt Lake Temple, and even a virtual MTC (Missionary Training Center).

Missionaries will be able to “knock” on virtual doors, engage in discussions, and even perform virtual baptisms, all while avoiding the dangers of the real world. “It’s like The Sims, but with more spiritual enlightenment,” Elder Savvy explained.

Early beta testers of the program have reported mixed results. Some missionaries have praised the new system for its safety and convenience, while others have expressed frustration with the occasional technical glitches. “I was in the middle of a discussion about the Plan of Salvation when my avatar got stuck in a wall,” said Elder Pixelated. “It was a little awkward.”

Despite the hiccups, church leaders are optimistic about the potential of virtual proselyting. “We see this as an opportunity to innovate and adapt to the changing times,” said President Cyber, a member of the church’s Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. “Plus, it’s a lot harder to slam a virtual door in someone’s face.”

As the church continues to roll out Missionary 2.0, ex-members and critics alike are watching with interest. Some have even suggested that the next step might be virtual sacrament meetings and temple ceremonies. “Who knows?” said one former member. “Maybe one day we’ll all be attending church in our pajamas from the comfort of our own homes. Oh wait, we already do that.”

Stay tuned for more updates on this virtual revolution in missionary work. In the meantime, if you see a pair of missionaries in your virtual neighborhood, don’t be afraid to say hello. They might just have a message for you.